Helping Our Children Succeed in School

As a high school teacher and parent of an SHS junior, I have learned from both sides some strategies to help my child succeed in school. Yes, she is working very hard to do well, I just nudge her along a little further in the following ways:

     1.  Trust But Verify

     2.  Phone Buddies

     3.  Parent/Teacher Cyber "Relationship"

     4.  Daily PowerSchool

     5.  Stay Involved

1. Trust But Verify.

This cliché is very helpful, especially when it comes to junior high and high school students. We want to believe them, and often we can, but not always. I can't tell you how many times I have conferenced with a parent whose child insists she hardly has any homework. Then, checking her records, we find a number of missing assignments. Teens and pre-teens live in the moment, and if it means they can text, listen to music, spend time with their friends, watch TV...they may conveniently "forget" what they have due. This is not necessarily a calculated, conscious effort to deceive, but a "spacing out" of their obligations to get what they want in the moment.

Solutions:

• Help your child get in the habit of using an assignment notebook and look at it nightly. (Initial it each day so your child — and teacher — can see how often you are checking it.)

• E-mail teachers. Verify what your child is telling you, especially if several days go by with supposedly "no homework" in a particular subject.

• Check PowerSchool. We are very lucky that our Shorewood schools use this system, and many teachers put their assignments in ahead of time with the due dates and point values. (more on PowerSchool later)

2. Phone Buddies

I advise my students (and daughter) to have the cell phone number of an A student from each of her classes. Then when she is struggling with an assignment, or is not sure of a due date, she can call and get help. The "buddies" can quiz each other over the phone as well in preparation for a test. Encourage your child to be a phone buddy for the classes she does well in — it will give her confidence and help her understand that we all have different strengths and challenges.

3. Establish a Parent/Teacher Cyber "Relationship."

E-mail your child's teachers periodically. Give feedback on lessons, assignments, readings, grades, etc., both positive and not-so. Remember to give the teacher the benefit of the doubt — what a teen may consider a "boring" class might be the most intellectually relevant (and hardest). Just as you don't want to only get the "bad" phone calls about your child, your teacher would appreciate positive feedback.

Establishing this relationship will go far in solving any bigger issues that may arise later. This also gives the teacher an easy way to tell you what is going on by just hitting "reply" and thanking you. She can then add: "Suzy gave the greatest answer today when we were discussing the themes of The Odyssey — I was impressed with her insight." Suzy’s answer may not have elicited an original e-mail, but is easy to add in reply to one. Teachers' workloads are extremely heavy, so don't expect long, frequent missives!

4. Check PowerSchool Daily.

Bookmark it! Make it part of your evening routine to check your child's grades. Most grades are entered very promptly and give you an up-to-the-minute report of where your child stands in every class. You'll know where you can back off and what to emphasize, and often can see extra credit opportunities that can help bring a grade up in between assignments. You'll see upcoming tests and assignments, how often homework is assigned, and your child's cumulative GPA. PowerSchool is a parent's friend! Your child may outwardly resent that you know so much about her school "business," but it is our job to know so we can help (and celebrate) them.

PowerSchool also helps keep teachers accountable. If you see too few assignments, or grades are not entered on a timely basis, e-mail the teacher.  PowerSchool provides great data for your child's privileges and revocations as well. Don't wait for report cards — that's old school!

5. Stay Involved in the School and Larger Community.

This is a tough one for working parents, but very important. How is money for the school being allocated? How are cuts determined? What decisions are being considered by the School Board and why? Get out there and be heard, respectfully and often. Fight for your child's school, teachers, programs, and funds — locally, statewide, and on a national scale. Don't ever miss a chance to cast an informed vote at all levels.

If you can, volunteer at school, or at the very least sit in on some classes. There is amazing work being done by educators in our schools everyday, under ever-worsening conditions. And it is a great chance to see your child in a different light — you'll see her slipping into adulthood in spite of herself!